


Apples and Oranges

by InkToTheLaptopScreen



Category: Black-ish (TV)
Genre: F/M, I havent touched this in so long but i wanted to upload this, Sorry if its bad near the end but i wrote a lot and i just, Wanted to upload this before i forget all about it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-09
Updated: 2017-03-09
Packaged: 2018-10-01 12:16:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10189724
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InkToTheLaptopScreen/pseuds/InkToTheLaptopScreen
Summary: Dre would love nothing more than to get his brother-in-law out of his house and out of his life. After a brief (and humiliating) encounter at the grocery store, it looks like his chance- in the form of a pretty, young lady with a nice ass that left dear Johan speechless- was gone for now.At least, that is what was assumed, until she steps back into their lives once again. For Dre's sake, she'll stick around this time.





	

 

There were many things in life that Dre Johnson did not enjoy. He didn't enjoy wearing the same shoes more than two days in a row, he didn't enjoy people opening his mail and taking his coupons, he didn't enjoy the idea of his mother dating, his daughter dating, veggie pizza, and the list goes on and on. But if there was one thing he really didn't enjoy, it was his dear brother-in-law, Johan.

 

Dre couldn't remember a time where Johan wasn't a pain in his side, never finding a moment where the man wasn't an annoyance while being in the same room as him. In fact, the only time Dre could tolerate him while he was in France.

 

So how he managed to get stuck with him while grocery shopping, he'll never know. What he did know, is that Johan was being his usual, pretentious self, leaving Dre having to constantly pull himself from that edge that would lead to what he would assume to be murder.

 

“Johan, if you can't find it in yourself to shut up in the next five seconds, my kids are going to be short an uncle.”

 

“I'm just saying-”

 

“And  **_I'm_ ** just saying,” he stopped himself and his shopping cart somewhere in the middle of the produce section, turning to Johan, “you really need to stop testing my patience! I used my day off to help my pregnant wife with the groceries, when I could've been at home, enjoying some very rare peace and quiet. The shopping, I don't mind, but messing with a man's peace and-” he stopped his rant when he noticed Johan wasn't even paying attention anymore, instead looking over his shoulder. Dre waved a hand aggressively in front of his face, snapping him out of his trance.

 

“Hey! I'm talking to you, Pierre.”

 

Johan cleared his throat, his eyes flicking back past Dre for a moment, before looking back at him. Dre turned around with a scowl, searching for whatever could be so distracting that Johan managed to miss all of his yelling. Then he spotted it.

 

Actually, he spotted  _ her. _

 

A young woman, leaning against her own stopped cart, phone in hand and oblivious to Dre and Johan’s stares. Dre’s scowl dropped, his face first shifting into a confused look, then a knowing one as he turned back to Johan with a genuine smile creeping up on his face.

 

“Okay, Johan. I see you.”

 

Johan began sputtering at that, trying his hardest not to look back at the woman.

 

“See- see what? I'm not- I just got distracted for a second. My- my mind just kind of,” he couldn't seem to hold still as he tried to defend himself, looking anywhere but in the woman’s direction, making large and extravagant gestures with his arms. Dre interrupted his babbling with a clap to the shoulder, laughter bubbling up from inside him.

 

“No need to explain yourself man. I get it.” He looked back to the girl, who has since shifted her attention from her phone, to the apples she was parked in front of, her head turned away from the pair.

 

“Go talk to her.”

 

For what Dre considered a peaceful second, Johan was stunned into silence. But it didn't last long before he was babbling again, something about how he “didn't have any reason to go bother her”, or how he “wasn't even looking at her”, or something along those lines. 

 

“Look,” Dre interrupted again, “why are you so afraid of one girl?” Johan was again silent for a moment, his gaze falling to the floor as he played with the sleeve of his sweater. 

 

“She's just so pretty,” he breathed out with a small laugh. “And I'm a bit rusty in the whole dating game. And she's so,” he looks back up again, taking up a puppy-love look on his face  before going back to the end of his sleeve, “ _ pretty. _ ”

 

Dre was about to roll his eyes at how easily Johan seemed to catch feelings for this girl, but then his mind started to wander. His brain painted a picture of Johan with this girl, happy, in love, and living together  _ out _ of Dre’s house. He smiled at the image, turning back to Johan and bringing both hands to his shoulders, casting another look at the woman to make sure she was still there in her spot.

 

“You'll be fine. She is just one girl, but she could also be the love of your life. No pressure, but you go over there and you charm her so hard that she'll already be planning your honeymoon.”

 

Johan was taken aback. Before he could question what the hell Dre was talking about, he was being shoved in the girl's direction. He paused for a moment to look back and Dre, who was urging him on to go. He took a deep breath, willing his mind and body to calm down, before walking across to where she stood, again engrossed by her phone.

 

Johan stood behind her, pretending to look at the oranges as he willed himself to say something. This went on for a while, but then he finally used his final ounce of courage to turn around and open his mouth, his hand coming up to run hair fingers through hair. But while he brought his hand up, he managed to knock an orange down from its place in its pile, causing it to fall to the floor and roll under the woman's cart. He stood completely still, not bothering to close his mouth or lower his hand as he watched her react. She saw the orange, pocketed her phone, and moved her cart forward so she could reach for the fruit and little easier. Of course she bent over to pick it up, since she obviously couldn't reach it if she didn't. This all should have been fine.

 

But then, Johan looked down.

 

Dre had stayed where Johan had left him, watching the scene from afar. He was watching as Johan walked behind the girl, watched as Johan pumped himself for talking, and watching now as Johan’s eyes dropped. Even from where he was standing, Dre saw how Johan’s face scrunched up and took in the sight before him. Dre knew if he was in the same position, he would definitely have been making a similar face, but that wouldn't had interfered with his goal. In fact, that would only make him more determined to talk to the woman. But in Johan’s case, that was his downfall. Dre watch as not only the man pulled of a face scrunch with so much raw emotion, but also as he apparently not-so-silently muttered what look to be “God-damn!” Dre couldn't hear it himself, but from the way Johan quickly brought a hand to his mouth, and from the way the girl's head straightened up as if she heard him, he put the pieces together himself.

 

Johan was quick to act, running off into one of the store's aisles before the woman could turn around. Even though his chances at getting Johan out of his home seemed to have lowered a bit, he still managed to find plenty of humour in the situation, laughing until there were tears in his eyes as he went to find where his brother-in-law had run off to. 

 

He had gotten pretty far, making sure there was plenty of distance between him and the girl. When Dre found him, his laughter came back as Johan went to gently hit head head against one of the shelves, groaning in embarrassment. Dre continued to laugh at him through the rest of their trip, and kept laughing when they got home. He was still laughing when everyone else was home, and he wasted no time in telling Bow what had just happened.

 

Dre definitely enjoyed this.

  “This man was betrayed by his own blackness!”

 

Johan groaned from his place on the couch, burying his face in the pillow her was clutching as Dre went on.

 

Rainbow was preparing lunch, listening to Dre and trying to send her brother some sympathy. 

 

“I'm telling you Bow, I wish I had a camera! I have never loved your brother as much as I love him now!”

 

She rolled her eyes at her husband “Well I, for one, feel sorry for him. That probably hurt his pride and you're not helping.” She felt a bit of pride herself when Dre sighed, his smile dropping into a more serious expression before he kissed her cheek.

 

“You're right, baby. I'm sorry.”

 

Just as she was about to thank him for finally letting up, but then he turned and yelled for the kids.

 

“Kids! Who wants to hear about how your uncle couldn't pick up a girl?”

 

Bow rolled her eyes and tried to stop him, but she was too late as all four of their kids came into the kitchen to hear this story. Even Earl and Ruby had wandered in, listening to Dre retell the embarrassing tale.

 

“Looks like Junior's girl problems come from your side of the family, mom.” That earned Zoey a high-five from Dre, an  offended  “Hey” from both Bow and Junior, and another groan from Johan. 

 

Earl shook his head. “Booty is a cruel mistress. It lures you in, making you feel safe and secured. Then when you're nice and comfortable, it finds a way to betray you.”

Another groan from Johan, this one louder and lasting longer than the last. 

 

Ruby moves to his side, cooing and reaching to pet his hair. His makes a sad attempt at avoiding the contact by curling up further, but to no avail. 

 

“Now, now. No need for any of that for a pretty, young thing you'll probably never see again. Why don't you focus your attention on a mature, more present woman.” When Ruby's hand moved from his hair to his arm, Bow finally stepped back in and shooed her away. She looked down at her brother with that same sympathetic look back on her face. She pulls him up into a sitting position, only to have him fall back on the couch. She tries again, and gets the same result as before. She rolls her eyes before one final try, and this time when he falls back, Johan ends up rolling off the couch and onto the floor, and he makes no move to get up. 

 

“You can't just lie here all day,” she says to the lump on the floor that is her brother.

 

“I can and I will,” is his slightly muffled response. Bow looks to Dre for help, and he makes his way over to the pair. But instead of helping, he plops himself down on the couch, grabbing the remote and turning on the TV. He sees the look Bow is giving him and holds out the remote to her. 

 

“Did you want to watch something?”

 

She rolls her eyes and goes back to getting Johan off the floor while he protests. Dre leans back into the couch.

It's been three days since the incident at the supermarket, and while Johan was eventually removed from the floor, he still hasn't removed himself from his funk. He managed to mope for almost a full 72 hours, and Bow was a mix between sorry for, and annoyed by her little brother. Whenever she would look at him, he had this sad, little puppy-dog look on his face that made her both want to hold him for comfort, and smack him upside the head. She let him known of the fact when he had moved from the couch to the kitchen to obtain the energy for another thirty minutes of couch-moping. Said energy would be obtained by icecream, which he has been eating a lot of in these past three days.

 

“Are you sure this wasn't a break up?” She asked as he scooped a large bite of Choco Chunky Monkey into his mouth. He paused for a second to look at her, then went right back to his bowl as she rolled her eyes next to him. She takes the bowl out of his hands, setting it to the side and ignoring his sounds of protests.

 

“Johan, this was just one girl! A girl who you've never spoken to, and a girl who you don't even know! You're acting like you've been in love with her your whole life and just got shot down.”

 

“What if she wasn't just one girl Rainbow? I felt something when I looked at her-”

 

“When you looked at her above the waist, or below it?” She earned a short laugh from Zoey, who was pushing past Johan to get to the fridge. Johan sighed and continued.

 

“ _ Anyway _ , I could feel this connection the moment I laid eyes on her, like I really did know her all my life. It was love at first sight.”

“Oh my god! Johan this is just like when we were kids- you said that so many times, and you've never had a relationship that lasted longer than a few months. In fact, when was the last time you've been with someone longer than one month?”

 

Before he could defend himself, Zoey stepped into the conversation with a raised brow and a glass of orange juice.

 

“Wait a second, uncle Johan was a player?”

 

Bow shook her head and Johan gave almost a hesitant shrug.

 

“I think the best term is ‘relationship challenged’.”

 

“Hey,” started Johan defensively, “I'll admit that I got around a bit, and a lot of my past relationships didn't work well for either sides, but I wasn't a player, nor was I “relationship challenged”, thank you very much.” With a smug smile, he takes back his ice cream and heads back to the couch. Both women follow him and sit on either side of him.

 

“I really don't know why I'm so hung up over this. Dre was the one who got me to approach her, but I think he just wanted a way to get me out his hair.” For the first time in a while, Bow felt genuinely bad for her little brother. She pulled him into a side hug, letting him rest his head on her shoulder while she rubbed his arm. Zoey  placed a hand on his shoulder, her own sympathetic look on her face.

 

“Now that I think about it, Dad probably got what he wants with you like this.”

 

Johan found it in himself to snort at that, a small smile forming on his lips. He sat up straight, putting his bowl down, and leaned back into the couch cushions.

 

“Yeah. You're probably right.” She was. With Johan in the state that he was, the most interaction Dre had with him was stepping around, or, in some cases, stepping  _ over _ him. As Dre walked into work, he knew nothing could ruin his continuous good mood.

 

Not even when he practically rammed into a figure turning a corner, therefore knocking them down and sending some papers flying. He was quick to help them with their papers, apologizing as he did. He had collected whatever papers the other person didn't, and finally got a look at them when he went to hand them back. He was met with a familiar looking girl.

 

“It's alright. I guess we both should've been looking where we were going,” she saw the papers in his outstretched hand, and gladly took them with a small ‘Thank you’. They both got up, Dre staring at her face, trying to figure out where he had seen her before. He had to push that thought away when he noticed her outstretched hand.

 

“Y/N L/N. I'm the new intern. I'll be working in the urban division.” Dre shook her hand, and lit up at the mention at his division. He talked with her for a bit as they made their way to their respective areas, learning a bit about each other and their roles. As it turns out, Y/N had just moved from out of state and will be working under Daphne while trying to get her online Bachelor’s. Dre listened as best as he could while trying to place her face, but just when he thought he had it, they were at the door to the meeting room, and she had her own tasks to get to.

 

“Well, that's enough about me for now. It was nice meeting you, Dre.” He smiled at her and watched as she walked away with a small wave. Subconsciously, his eyes flickered down her figure as she moved further and further away, then realization hit him like a ton of bricks. He swung open the door to the meeting room, wide eyed and jaw hitting the floor as his co-workers stared at him.

  
“The new intern is Supermarket Booty Girl,” he gasps out. 

**Author's Note:**

> All I can say is, I hope you enjoy this chapter and come back for more ❤❤


End file.
